House of Estrogen

Weekend Odds, Ends, and Observations

1. Yesterday, I was behind a car with not one, but two Piggly Wiggly bumper stickers on the bumper. Who puts a grocery store sticker on their car? Why does a grocery store even have bumper stickers? Why would a grocery store have more than one design for bumper stickers? Who would buy one? Who would buy two? Does Harris-Teeter, Albertson's, Lowe's, or Publix have bumper stickers? These are the questions that now haunt me.
   
2. This evening, we had dinner at a cafeteria. Addison was telling us how great her zucchini muffin was. She said, "I pointed to the muffin, and then the lady told me it was zucchini. I thought "ick", but I had already pointed to it, so I thought, 'well, I'll just roll with it.'"  Love that... just rolling with the zucchini.
3. I am not a fan of sleep-overs. I relearn this at least once a month.
4. I ordered our Christmas cards, and I was sent a proof. My pictures looked fine. My text looked fine. The card itself has stripes though, and it was randomly missing one stripe in the middle of the card. How does this happen? Aren't the stripes part of the card template? I contacted customer service, and they agreed the stripe was mysteriously missing from the proof. They are now sending me a new proof. I'm so puzzled though. How does a background stripe go missing?
5. Elise tried out for and made "team show" for jump rope. This is exciting news for her, but we now have jump rope a minimum of four days per week instead of three. I wonder if I just leave her at the jump rope gym with a sleeping bag and some food if her school bus could start picking her up and dropping her off there instead.
6. We ran into some neighbors at the mall this afternoon. They said, "We saw all kinds of craziness at your house this morning! One of your children was outside in her underwear, two of them in their pajamas. The car alarm was going off, and they were all running around, slamming the car doors. It was quite comical."  Nice. This is how we impress the neighbors. J.C. walked up a minute later, and I said, "Did you know our child was running around outside in her underwear this morning?"  He said, "Yeah, I got in my car to leave for a bike ride, and I saw her in underwear and a bikini top in 40 degree weather. I thought, 'well... nothing I can do about that,' so I just drove off."  Clearly, we have completely given up on sane parenting.

They Better Enjoy It!

This past Christmas, Nina asked for a backyard zipline. J.C. and I talked it over, scoped out a location in the backyard and decided it would work. We knew we would need to take down a few small trees in the yard, but that shouldn't have been a problem. About a month before Christmas, a tree man knocked on our door saying that he was in the neighborhood taking down a tree for a neighbor and wondered if we had any trees that needed work. Without thinking much about it, J.C. told him no and sent him on his way. A few minutes later, it dawned on us, "the zipline!"  We brought the tree guy over and asked him to cut down the one tree that J.C. was a little nervous about felling himself. It was leaning toward the house a little, so J.C. thought it was best to have a professional do it. Of course, the tree guy recommended a bit more work when he pointed out some trees that were brushing up against our roof. Five hundred dollars later, we were missing two trees and a bunch of limbs. Talk about an impulse buy. Anyway, Nina wanted the zipline, and we had been convinced the other work was necessary, so good-bye five hundred dollars. She better love that zipline.

Two days later, we received this email from our neighborhood HOA.

Good afternoon!  The Architectural Committee of REDACTED wanted to reach out to you and get a little more information on a tree or trees you recently had removed.

 

Could you please provide more information on the removal, such as how many, why they were removed, do you plan to remove any more, etc., and I will forward to the Committee.

 

I have also attached the architectural guidelines. Tree removal is referenced on page 23.

 

Seriously? It was two trees... out of our backyard of MANY, MANY trees. Nobody could have possibly noticed that the trees were missing, but clearly somebody had noticed we had tree men in the yard. A neighbor had felt the need to report us to the HOA police. This didn't go over well with me, so I might have sent this email in response.

 

While I appreciate that the architectural committee has a job to do to keep our neighborhood looking neat and tidy, I do not appreciate the "Big Brother is watching over you" email two days after we had some work done. 

 

My front yard is landscaped, and we keep the grass trimmed. My garbage cans are adequately hidden from view of the street. When the tree in our side yard was threatening to fall on our neighbor's driveway, we removed it and replaced it with a more suitable tree for that location. My backyard is woodsy and will continue to be so.  I believe that my house and yard fit in with the rest of the homes in the neighborhood. The goal of the architectural committee is to maintain the overall aesthetic appearance of the neighborhood and to protect the value of our homes. The work done Monday did nothing to change that.

 

I should not have to justify the removal of two trees on my own property. Anyone driving past my house would notice nothing different from the way it looked a week ago. If the neighbor who turned us in would like to come talk to us directly, I'm usually home in the evenings to talk with my neighbors and answer any questions they may have.  I've always thought of REDACTED as a friendly neighborhood where neighbors would reach out and talk to each other when they have questions or concerns, but apparently I was wrong.  The architectural committee's response to seeing a tree removal truck in front of my house is overblown and unnecessary.

 After much aggravation and many emails back and forth with the architectural committee, we got approval to remove the last few trees we needed to take out to make safe passage for the zipline. It turns out any tree over 4 feet tall that you want to remove needs approval. Really? Isn't anything under 4 feet tall a shrub?  I understand the HOA's policies of approving paint colors before you paint your house fluorescent pink, and I understand why they have a rule against broken down cars in your front yard. I will never understand the amount of red tape we had to go through to remove a few small trees. We had to get approval from every neighbor whose property touches ours. One poor guy had just moved in that week. "Welcome to the neighborhood! Will you sign this form saying I can cut down a couple small trees in my own backyard?"

Needless to say, had we known ahead of time the expense, aggravation, and time suck that this Christmas gift was going to be, we never would have gone for it. Now that it is here, THE KIDS BETTER ENJOY IT. Daily. With friends. Without friends. During all their free time. For years. When they are home from college over Christmas break.

Fortunately, they are loving it. If it had been one of those gifts that is played with Christmas morning and then tossed aside, we might have tossed Nina out with it. It is now almost April though, and it still sees play time every weekend and during the week too.

 

The entire neighborhood seems to be enjoying it, so I'm expecting to be cited with noise complaints any day now. Surely I am breaking some HOA rule by having this many kids in my backyard without pre-approval.

 

Want to come over and ride the zipline?

HoE Christmas 2013

We have had a lovely Christmas season. Having the kids off of school for the whole month makes holiday fun so much more relaxing. Of course, we have had our fair share of "I'm bored", "You're the meanest sister EVER!" and "Mommmmm, she hit me!", but overall, it has been good. We have baked cookies, decorated gingerbread men, attended holiday parties, and pigged out on holiday donuts at Krispy Kreme. (The BEST donuts ever. All you Dunkin Donuts fans (RB... talking to you!) need to get your taste buds tested. There is no comparison. I know this as fact because I went to school in Winston-Salem, NC, where Krispy Kreme started. Beat that.)

We went to see the Nutcracker Ballet. Note that my mom dressed for "the season" while the rest of us dressed appropriately for the weather!

Disney on Ice was the other holiday show we attended. Now, someone answer this question for me. See the ridiculously overpriced snowcone Nina is holding in this photo? They had that identical cup in four characters - Cinderella, Tinkerbelle, Mickey and Minnie. The Cinderella and Minnie snowcones were $10. The Tinkerbelle and Mickey snowcones were $12. What gives? Doesn't that seem unfair to moms of boys? They were all the same size, yet if you had a boy who insisted on a Mickey snowcone, you had to cough up the extra $2. Needless to say, Nina's choices were limited to Cinderella or Minnie.

As Christmas Eve rolled around, I decided my old lady hip was not up to cooking a big dinner like we usually do. Instead, we declared it finger food night, and everyone chipped in. J.C. made sausage balls. Elise made pigs in blankets. Addie put together a crackers and cheese plate. Nina cut veggies for veggies and dip. I made Grinch kabobs. Cute, eh? Credit goes to some creative person on Pinterest. I just copy.

I can remember Christmas dinners growing up when we each made a dish. My dad always made an appetizer - usually involving smoked salmon and hearts of palm. I would usually make a veggie or dessert. My mom would make the rest. It seemed all family-family-joy-joy and Christmasy at the time, but now I get it. It is really nice to have help in the kitchen! I'm thinking finger food Christmas Eve where everyone pitches in may become our new tradition.

Christmas Eve night, I had my heart set on watching either Arthur Christmas or Elf. I figured between Netflix streaming, Amazon Prime streaming, Uverse on-demand, and HBO on-demand this would be as easy as turning on the TV and hitting play. WRONG. We couldn't get either of those movies through any of those methods without paying about $10. What? Huh? It used to be you could find Elf on TV on just about any station any time of day for the whole month of December. Now I have to pay $10 for it? Bah Humbug. We watched some forgettable princess movie instead. Between now and next Christmas, I will be purchasing DVDs of Elf and Arthur Christmas, so we will have them for next Christmas Eve.

Before heading to bed to wait up for Santa, the girls opened their Christmas Eve PJ's and we lit the luminarias on the driveway.

Christmas morning featured Christmas morning video failure for the second year in a row. Why am I so incompetent when taking videos on Christmas morning? I don't have this problem any other time I want to take videos. Frustrating as it may be, if you could see the video, it went something like this: Kids running down the stairs. Nina and Addie run to their Santa gifts saying, "Yea", "Cool", or "Awesome". Elise runs to her Santa gift and yells, "A phone! OMG! Santa got me a phone! I can't believe I have a phone! Squeee!!! No way!! No way!  I have a phone! OMG! I have a phone! What's my phone number? Squeee!!! I can't believe it!!"  The other kids can barely be seen or heard in the background. Anyway, it would have been a great video, but you'll just have to use your imagination. I don't even have photos showing her excitement because I was so busy "videotaping". Sigh.

The rest of the morning was spent opening gifts,

cheering about good ones,

and putting new ornaments on the tree.

My parents came over for brunch which was very low-key. I was all about simplicity this year. I know you can hardly see these in the photo, but my mom made the Christmas cowboy boot napkins and table runner for me. I love them!

After opening gifts with my parents,

we played some games,

read some new books,

played with the new Guitar Hero set,

and Nina did some sketching with her new pens and sketch book.

In the afternoon, Nina put on her new favorite shirt (for fun... ask Siri "What does the fox say?"), and ...

we went over to J.C.'s parents' house for more gifts, more food, and fun with cousins.

While 2013 was my year for scaling back Christmas and cooking as little as humanly possible, my mother-in-law went in the opposite direction. She decided to turn Christmas dinner preparation into an Olympic sport. I don't think I've ever seen that much food in my life. It covered every square inch of the kitchen counters and kitchen table, and then overflowed to the top of the washer and dryer and into the garage. I think she deserves a medal, or at the very least a weeklong nap.

The big feast was enjoyed by all though.

 

After dinner, we decided to attempt mission impossible - a photograph of all 27 family members in attendance without an SLR camera, a wide angle lens, or a tripod. J.C. came up with this brilliant idea for a tripod though. Nice, eh?

Given the circumstances, I think the picture turned out remarkably well!

I apologize for the length of this post. I certainly had no intentions of it growing this long when I first started writing it. 2013 really was a nice Christmas though - full of fun, smiles, family, and food... just as it should be. I hope yours was too.

 

 

Merry Christmas, Y'all!

Gives Me Chills... Happy Chills

Yes, I know... it is marketing. It is a great advertising to create a video that you know will go viral. Still, I love this. I love the Christmas spirit of it (ignoring the whole marketing piece). I love that these passengers will have this happy Christmas memory forever! It makes me smile.

Holidays are in da House!

We are in full-on holiday mode here. The kids are out of school for the month, report cards have come home, and we are DONE.WITH.HOMEWORK for the year. Done. Having the month of December off of school has to be one of the greatest perks of year-round school. We can enjoy holiday parties, weeknight shopping, and Christmas TV specials without homework and school bedtimes interfering. Being done with school also means that we have a month of not having to face the school bus driver at the end of the day to hear her report about our little kindergarten school bus bully. <Sigh> Apparently one of Addison's quotes on the last day of school was, "I'm going to kick the poo out of your vagina." Nice. If she doesn't get kicked off the bus before the end of the school year, it is going to be a miracle. Yes, a month off of school is something we all desperately needed.

Back to holiday mode... our trees are up.

The stockings are hung, and the folk art Santas are chilling on the mantle.

We have finished up the school holiday parties,

made Christmas trees at holiday camp,

and attended the holiday mini-build at the LEGO store.

Elise has performed in her holiday band concert. (As a side note, you can see her braces are in the holiday spirit as well with red and green rubber bands.)

Addison has done rounds at a rehab center with her Daisy troop, singing songs, and doling out homemade ornaments. When I asked her how it went, she said, "Two people didn't have any legs, and one person was missing all their fingers."  I'm just picturing this entire troop of girls staring at injuries, completely forgetting to sing. I hope they didn't traumatize any of the patients too much. (For any of you fashionistas taking note... yes, she is wearing Oilily with cowboy boots. That's how she rolls.)

I have purchased mint chips and red and green m&m's under the guise of baking. We'll see if any baking actually occurs. Buying supplies is the first step though, right?

I haven't put up any outdoor lights yet, but I'm contemplating skipping them this year. If I consciously make the decision to forgo outdoor lighting, then I can say that job is done. I'm kind of liking that plan.

All in all, the holiday spirit has definitely taken over here at the House of Estrogen. Holidays are IN DA HOUSE!

Fly-By Christmas and New Year's Post

I'm behind in my blogging, and nobody wants to hear about Christmas any more, so this will be a quick fly-by of our holidays. Christmas Eve was simple - just the five of us, a slightly overcooked pork roast, a sweet potato casserole, some veggies and champagne. Nobody told me pajamas were the required attire for the evening, so I looked a bit out of place.

Christmas morning, I was set up at my usual spot on the couch, video camera in hand, as I have every Christmas for years, ready to film the girls running down the stairs to discover the Santa gifts. Santa was generous this year, so I couldn't wait to catch their reactions on film. You know where this is going, right? The camera was set on photo rather than video, so I took a single photo of them at the top of the stairs. Nice.  It turns out it was for the best anyway though. They ran down to find a huge green box from Santa. When they lifted the lid, a note was carried up by balloons.

Here's a closer look.

A trip to Disney World! The most magical place on earth! Every child's dream come true! No better Santa gift!

Uh. No. Not at all. They opened the box, did not even look at the sign, and headed to their stockings. Then, when J.C. pointed out the sign, Elise gave us a moderately enthusiastic, "Yea! Disney World!", Nina said, "What did Santa bring me?", and Addison kept on heading to the stockings.  Their reactions were underwhelming, to put it nicely. Then, they opened their stockings while I murmured under my breath, "spoiled rotten... mumble, mumble, Santa might just send JC and me to Hawaii instead...mumble, mumble... see if Santa ever brings anything extravagant again... mumble, mumble"  I think it is fortunate none of that was captured on tape, don't you?

After stockings, the gift opening commenced.

"A new bathrobe... way more exciting than Disney!"

"Mickey Mouse? Who cares?  There is Play-doh!"

Then it was off to my in-laws' house for a lovely turkey dinner and more gifts.

"A crochet set! Thank goodness for Grandmamma knowing that a crochet hook would be better than the Magic Kingdom!"

No, I'm not bitter. Really. I'm not. I never even contemplated telling them that Santa revoked his gift. Honest.

The day after Christmas was better. I started my morning off with a peppermint mocha using a Starbuck's gift card and reading a book purchased with an Amazon gift card. Then we grew crystals,

built a treehouse out of Legos,

and played new games. It was a fun day.

A couple days later, Elise's jump rope team performed at half-time of an NCSU basketball game. They didn't have the same type of practice space at PNC Arena that the team has usually had for basketball games, so the performance was not as strong as it should have been. It was fun seeing them up on the big screens though.

On New Year's Eve, we went to Games Night at a friend's house. We played board games, party games, the Wii, and Addie had a ball running around with the other kids her age. It was a fun, laid-back way to ring in the new year.

Overall, the holidays were nice. We had ups and downs, but we all enjoyed the time off of work and school and time spent with family. I have finally come to peace with the fact that the Pez and M&M's had a bigger wow factor than a Disney trip. Lesson learned.

Dear ______, Thank you for the ______.

My mom was one of those mean mothers who was a stickler for thank you notes. After every Christmas and birthday, I remember sitting at the table having the importance of thank you notes drilled in to me and being made to write them. Like every child of a mean thank-you-note-writing-mom, I'm sure I complained. I'm sure I procrastinated. I'm sure many of my notes were hastily written, so I could run off to play. Looking back, I can honestly say, "Mom, thank you for sticking with it." Now, as an adult, the importance of a hand-written thank you note is understood, and I appreciate them that much more. There is no better way to show your gratitude. I'm trying my best to follow in my mom's footsteps as a mean thank-you-note-enforcer. I don't always succeed. Occassionally notes go out really late, through email, or (dropping my head in shame) not at all. Despite misses here and there, I want my children to grow up with the same foundation. To that end, we spent this morning at the kitchen table writing Christmas thank you notes.  If you've never made your five year old dictate a thank you note for you to write, you are missing out. Here are two from this morning.

Dear JoJo and Bubba,

Thank you for the P book. It will let me learn how to read because of letters. I like the letter R because it is my favorite letter in the whole state. I hope you can walk better soon.

Love, Addison

Dear Aunt L,

Thank you for the Wizard of Alls movie. I like it so much. I was wishing for it so much. How did you know that? I like the Wizard of Alls because I was wishing for it. My favorite is all of the sparkling shoes. The part of the movie I like is when the house got on one of the witches. Happy New Year!

Love, Addison

How sad would it be if I deprived the gift givers of notes like those.  My hope for my children is that one day they will appreciate the dying art of thank you note writing and continue the habit as adults. When I am a grandmother, I hope to get notes from my grandchildren about their favorite letter in the state and favorite part of the Wizard of Alls!

Letter to Santa 2012

This letter was left out next to a plate of cookies by the fireplace this evening...

Dear Santa,

These are cookies for you. I hope you like them. There are some things we want:

Addie wants a kangorro.

Elise want a new iPod.

Nina wants anything Zebra.

Love from, Elise, Nina and Addie

A kangaroo? Well, at least she dreams big. It is good to have ambition, right?

Holiday Medley Fun

I think that Kurt Hugo Schneider is pretty much a genius when it comes to videos. You may remember some of his videos posted on my blog previously, here and here. I follow his youtube channel, and he never ceases to blow me away with his talent and creativity. For your holiday entertainment, here is his latest video, a holiday medley. As you watch, keep in mind his note at the beginning - that this video was done in one take, and with no visual effects or editing. Amazing. Enjoy!

Happy Holidays!