House of Estrogen

Channeling my Inner Tiger Mother

Before I read Amy Chua's book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, I had preconceived ideas about her from reading her Wall Street Journal article and hearing clips about her on the news. I was convinced I was going to think that she was a harsh, demanding, overbearing, abusive mother. I was sure that I would not agree with any of her parenting tactics. Then, I read the book. As I read, I immediately recognized myself as fairly typical of the "Western parents" that she criticizes. I praise my children if they try hard, regardless of the grades or outcome. I let my children choose their own activities and quit when they tire of them. I encourage my children to work hard in school, but I do not demand it. Conversely, the tiger mother chooses activities, forces hours of practice, and demands nothing less than A's in school. While I can never picture myself following in Amy Chua's footsteps, I did begin to realize there could be a happy medium between the two parenting styles. I agreed with her that perhaps some of my Western parenting ways let my children "off the hook" too easily. I could think of times when I could have pushed them harder or given more of a critique rather than praising the effort.

I made the decision that I would channel my inner Tiger Mother. I wasn't going to ban sleepovers and playdates. I wasn't going to make them practice a musical instrument for hours every night. I wasn't going to call my children "garbage" or "fatty" like Amy Chua has done. That said, I knew I could bring a little Tiger into our home, and I thought it was worth a try.

A couple months ago, Nina told me that she wanted to go to ice skating camp for all three weeks of track-out camp. I love that she enjoys skating. The rink is a bit out of the way for us though, so it isn't the most convenient place for camp. I knew there was a holiday ice show coming up, and that campers had the opportunity to do a group number in the show. Nina had said very vehemently that she had NO intentions of doing the show. As much of a ham as Nina is at home, she is very uncomfortable performing or being in the spotlight. I had asked her about the show several times, and she had always refused. I thought the show would be a good experience for her though. So, WWTMD?  (What Would Tiger Mother Do?)  Well, Tiger Mother would already have her skating six hours a day with the toughest coach at the rink, so I'm already behind on that one. Tiger Mother would definitely force her to do the show though. In my not quite so forceful way, I said, "Nina, I will only sign you up for two weeks of camp if you do the holiday show." She thought about it for a minute, and then said, "OK. I'll do it."  She later told her dad, "Mom is forcing me to do the show."  I gave myself a little Tiger Mother pat on the back for making her to do something she really didn't want to do because I thought it was best. Tiger Mother would be proud. Maybe.

As Nina started preparing for the show, she was just a bundle of excitement - the costumes, the jackets, the rehearsals, the spotlights, the routine - she was loving it. She came home from camp every day with a big smile on her face. I thought to myself, "This Tiger Mother thing is the way to go. If I hadn't made her do the show, she wouldn't know what a great experience it could be."

Nina skated in the show last Friday, and she was beaming through the whole performance.

She was the youngest in her group, and the most beginner of the four, but she skated her heart out. Of course, the real Tiger Mother's child would have been doing triple lutzes. I'm still a Western mom at heart though, so I was quite proud of her bunny hops.

When the show was over, I said, "Nina, aren't you glad I made you do the show?" She agreed, and the next morning, she even said it was sad that it was all over.

Imagine my surprise when a couple days ago Nina said, "Mom, I want to stop skating. I want to do
gymnastics instead." What? What happened to that smiling child who wanted to go to skating camp every day and was sad when the ice show was over? What happened to that child who wanted skating pants more than anything else for Christmas?

More importantly, WWTMD? Well, Tiger Mother would simply tell her "no", lace up her skates, and push her out on to the rink. Hmmm.. this Tiger Mother thing is hard. J.C. and I both talked to Nina for a while to find out exactly what was going on. (Tiger Mother would not approve.) Basically, she just wanted a little break to do something different for a while. She doesn't want to stop skating completely, but we only let her do one sport at a time, and she was ready for a change. It sounded reasonable to us. So, as a stereotypical Western parent, I cancelled the next session of skating and called a gym about gymnastics lessons. 

My poor inner Tiger... she didn't last long. At least I know I can call on her when I need her.

 

Nina's Knees

Two weeks of ice skating camp, skating all day, every day has its consequences. Nina still claims she wants to spend the entire month of December at skating camp though. Come December, we'll be quoting Sam Beauregarde,"Violet! You're turning violet, Violet!"

 

What Do You Know?

Earlier this week, my good friend C over at Brightenthecorner posted What Do You Know? - a game to post at least five things you know. Following in her footsteps, here are five things I know.

1. I know that I have some sort of civic black cloud of karma over me this week. On Tuesday, I got summoned for jury duty. On Wednesday, I got pulled over and received a ticket for an expired registration. The court dates for both are in the same week. Good times.

2. I know that the politically correct thing for me to say is that I will miss Elise horribly while she is at camp this week, and that it pains me to even think of my child being away from me for a week. That said, I can't wait. I think Elise will have a ball. I always loved summer camp as a child, and I know she will too. Also, a week of just two children in the house sounds so quiet, peaceful, and relaxing.

3. I know that I don't like Dunkin' Donuts. The Daylight Donuts near us went out of business, so we were stuck with Dunkin this morning for breakfast.  I don't like them. I don't know why it is so popular. They don't make good donuts.

4. I know that my poor husband was in a bike wreck yesterday and is pretty beat up. He injured his ribs and wrist, and is all scraped up on his face and back.

5. I know that round trip flights to San Antonio right now are only $160. I really want to go down there to see C and some other friends who are going to the Hill Country Hyatt in August, but J.C. is going to be out of town, so I don't think I can make it work. Wah.

So there you go... five things I know. What do you know?

I Want to be a Kid Again

When I was a kid, there was no such thing as clown camp.

 

I want to be a kid again, so I can go to clown camp, learn to juggle, paint my face, learn magic tricks, and make balloon animals.

 

When I was a kid, there was no such thing as an aquatic Easter egg hunt.

 

I want to be a kid again, so I can swim around in floaties grabbing Easter eggs as they bob up and down in the water.

 

I want to be a kid again, so I can have the thrill of donning goggles and diving down to retrieve cement filled eggs.

 

I want to be a kid again, so I can feel complete wonderment and awe over blowing a soap bubble.

 

Without the luxury of a magic time machine though, I can be content to live these experiences through the eyes of my children because that is a magical experience in itself.

 

Jurassic Park

The girls made these at "Trashosaurus Rex" art camp last week. I want to go to camp!

 

 

 

  

Toga! Toga! Toga!

Elise's troop leader sent this picture last night from Girl Scout camp. Look at this and tell me you don't find yourself chanting, "Toga! Toga! Toga!"

Flair for Drama

Elise just finished up a week at one of her favorite track-out camps, a drama camp. Art and drama are definitely two of Elise's loves. I have no idea where those interests may lead her, but for now, she is completely in her element doing anything art related.

Elise has attended this camp twice previously. The play is always based on a children's book, and in the past, we have made a point of reading the book several times before camp started. This time, the hustle and bustle of life got the best of me, and I didn't get a chance to check the book out of the library. The book this session was The Monster Who Did My Math. While the play was delightful, I couldn't always catch all the dialog, so I think I need to go back to read the book to grasp the whole story line! Next time, I'll remember to check out the book ahead of time.

Here is Elise and one of her BFFs S before the play started. They had the job of seating audience members. I think Elise was actually more excited about that job than the play itself! The other picture is of the little sister BFF's, Nina and N. Elise and S were in the same daycare class from age 1 until they went off to kindergarten. Nina and N have been in the same class together since they were 8 months old. 

  

Here's a short clip from the play. Elise played the role of the teacher. You'll quickly realize why I wished I had read the story first!

 

After dinner, we went out for a post-play pizza feast. Addie even got in on the meal gnawing on a pizza crust!

 

An Artist A Day

Elise has been attending a track-out camp all week called "An Artist A Day" where they have focused on a particular artist each day of camp, learning about his work, and then doing their own artwork in that style. This kind of thing is right up Elise's alley. She was in heaven!

 Impressionism: Vincent van Gogh's Starry Night, and Elise's rendition of Starry Night

 

Piet Mondrian, and Elise does Mondrian

 

Surrealist faces by Salvador Dali and Elise

And the abstract expressionist movement demonstrated by Jackson Pollock and Elise (on both paper and her apron!)

 

Art Appreciation

My parents are very enthusiastic about the arts - the symphony, the opera, art museums, folk art galleries, the works. The arts are a passion for my dad, in particular. As you might imagine, they made every attempt to raise me with this same appreciation for the arts. This involved dragging me to more than my fair share of art museums as a child. I enjoyed attending plays and musicals. I did my best to avoid going to opera. Every vacation though seemed to involve at least one art museum. I enjoyed a few of them, was bored through many, and in the end, unfortunately, I don't think I acquired their love for the arts. That's certainly not for lack of effort on their part though! I do remember liking one exhibit in particular... the works of Alexander Calder. His bright colored sculptures and mobiles were something even a museum weary kid could get excited about. I even had a poster in my bedroom with pictures from his circus.

This week, Elise has been attending an art track-out camp in the mornings. She has absolutely loved it, and she has come home each day with paintings, pastel drawings, and sculptures. Today was especially great. They discussed Calder, and then each child made a miniature circus based on Calder's Circus!

   

I may not be a connoisseur of the arts like my parents, but I can share my appreciation for an artist like Calder with my daughter! Who knows... maybe she'll be the one to follow in her grandfather's footsteps with a passion for the arts.

Her acting debut

Elise attended a fantastic performing arts track-out camp this week. The kids spent the week preparing for their performance on Friday evening. They were performing a play based on the book A Bad Case of Stripes by David Shannon. They were in charge of designing and painting sets, making costumes, writing the play, creating posters to decorate the lobby, making tickets, etc. Elise had so much fun each and every day!

The play was fantastic! The kids all did a great job. In the video below, you can see Elise playing the part of Dr. Mellon. She is the last one in line as all the experts and specialists march on stage.

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